Thankful 42--Because Today Hurt

I woke up this morning, wrote a blog, prayed for folks, wrote some notes, took care of some writing stuff God told me to address, and chose to "leap into the next adventure", per God's words.

And the next thing I knew I was the target of significant enemy fire. I won't go into all the details, but it was so personal and so clearly a targeted offensive that a song I had just told someone earlier today still rips at my heart came on while I was sitting at dinner with my children. I haven't heard the song on the radio in MONTHS, maybe since before Christmas, and today, I mention the flood of memories and hurt it creates, and BAM! There it is on the radio in a public place where I can't change the channel, and the other hits were just as personal, just as deep, and just as hard.

I stood in front of God and said, "I just told these people not to quit, and I want to. If I had a place to turn in my resignation letter, I would. I'm tired. This has been one helluva a long hard ride. I'm going to bed."

And I did.

Two hours later, I woke up, and to tell you the truth, I feel battered and sore. Physically I even ache.

"Okay, God, talk to me. I'm not a quitter, and I refuse to just keep taking hits, so give me something. How do I stand in the midst of this assault?"

As I was praying, I received an email asking about my daughter's doctor's appointment.

"Doozy of a headcold, bronchitis closing up her chest. Breathing treatments, nasal spray steroid, antihistamine, decongestant, ibuprofen, water, steam showers, and the usual. As for Friday's audition--"

I stopped. Another missile hit. One audition since my mom died in October, and she has to be sick for this one? Really?

I went back into the message and typed in, "Thankfully, the earache is pressure not infection."

Thankfully....

Thankfully.

Thankfully...

1009. We are able to see a doctor when we need to.

1010. We have clean water for her to drink.

1011.  I know God is bigger than this.

1012. God hears my pleas and never says I am stupid for not seeing the obvious answer...of giving thanks.

1013.  Medical readily available to us.

1014. Long sleeps that are much needed.

1015. Geometry help. (Dear God, when I have to repent for hatred, does that include hatred for geometry? If so, I may really have a problem.)

1016. Finding SIX (not four!) years of pictures.

1017. Help with electronics when I get overwhelmed.

1018. Anna's funky hair color.

1019. Other people who have trigger music, too, and understand how one can go from fine to an emotional heap in just four notes of the wrong song

1020. A way groovy foreman on the crew working on our road

1021. That my truck did not just sit stuck in the mud this morning but by God's grace slid to the "solid" spot and could get traction to go out the other way (deep spiritual truth in that, Lord)

1022. A place to retaliate, to stand against the assault, to refuse to quit

1023. For emails from MaryB that are exact words from God. I read the email and thought, "Wonder if God pipes." He answered, every time Mary does, I'm right with her either playing along or just listening tapping my toe. It's good stuff." Yes, it is.

1024. The precious folks who ask, "How did it go?" because they have been waiting and really want to know. I love you more than I have words to say.

1025.  FOR EVERYONE WHO DID NOT QUIT TODAY

Indeed, God in heaven...thankfully....

Enjoying the Day

This morning I woke up mentally and emotionally heavy. It's the kind of morning that seduces me to stay in bed and wallow in the sadness and glum of my life at the moment. No tears fall. No defined emotion, just a numbed misery that wants to suck me in and suck the life out of me.

It is easy to succumb.

But I don't.

Instead, I speak the heavy thoughts to the Lord, the ones that whisper hopelessness and loneliness. I tell Him my concerns, the ones over which I have so little control. I confide my desires--to be loved, to embrace these trials, to learn from them, to learn to battle through them, to enjoy this day anyway. 

To enjoy this day anyway. Quite possibly the hardest battle of all. 

I have become rebellious to the plastic mentality of putting on a happy face and pretending all is fine even when my heart has been ripped out of my chest and I feel I can't breathe. I have become militant in my determination to be real, to live authentically, to embrace every moment and every emotion, suck all the wisdom out of them, and then move forward. I will not lie about my pain so others can feel better or be more comfortable around me.  Yet, despite my choice to embrace the feelings of the moment, I have become ardent in refusing to let them define me or my day.  I have become passionately purposeful in living each day with hope, joy, and excitement--to live life at its most glorious...anyway.

Life at its most glorious is not an absence of trials. It is the choice to flourish in and because of the trials.

How do I do that today?

"Lord, give me strength."

He answers, "Strong is something you choose to be. Strong is the choice to do the right thing. You know how to be strong."

"Give me wisdom."

"I am. Right now."

"Lord, tell me what I need to do right now to embrace life at its most glorious."

"You're doing it. You are embracing the option and the day's possibilities."

"I can't pretend to be happy."

"I'm happy you won't pretend."

I chuckle.

"So what do I do to move past this? Because hopeless and gloomy are not who I am."

"Then be you and enjoy it. Enjoy what you bring to the world. Enjoy the hope and encouragement you bring. Enjoy you. I do."

A soft laugh, and I smile.

Be you...and enjoy it...I do.

Honestly, so do I. 

I take a deep breath and sigh contentedly. Oh, yeah, it's going to be a great day.

Job's Friends Could Take Lessons

The clock tells me it is nearly 12:30 am. I've been sitting here trying to find a beginning place for this post for...a while. It seems that posting has been extremely difficult for several months. I have tried. I have started untold number of posts only to close Blogger without posting anything. Two posts actually went public before I deleted them. Mostly, though, I sit here at the keyboard and wonder what to say that isn't continually depressing and is worth your time to read. Often, I find nothing.

That is not to say my life has been utterly depressing this whole time. It hasn't. However, I will tell you honestly the last eight months make up one of the hardest times of my life. Sometimes finding words to convey the reality of life is simply impossible. There are facts that cannot be shared for various reasons, and there are emotions that words cannot begin to express. When that happens, what is there to communicate?

The fact is that for much of the last eight months I have hurt more completely than I ever thought I could. I have amazing friends who are ready to answer a phone any time of day or night, but it seems pointless to call when all you can say is, "I hurt." There were times I lay on my couch or my bed, and my body shook with my sobs. I had no words to even pray. I simply cried until numbness took over, and then I would lie there staring at nothing. I didn't think God had abandoned me. I didn't feel forsaken. I simply had no way to verbalize the pain or address the cause of the pain. So I just was.

When I could talk to my friends, I would tell them without doubt that God's promises are solid. He never lies, and in the end, joy and restoration would abound. However, I wasn't at the end. I was in the desert, and the desert is a hard place that humbles you. It leaves you on your knees, desperate, gasping. "In the future things would be great, but right now, I hurt so much I feel like I can't breathe."

Thankfully, my friends weren't like Job's. My friends are more like Jesus. They prayed with me, for me. They gave me funny cards, encouraging emails, Kleenex. They kept reminding me that the fire might be hell but I wasn't alone. They never doubted the promises either. No matter how things looked or what twists came, they never doubted the promises that God would fully redeem, fully heal, and fully restore.

When I got tired of the battle, they stepped in and battled for me. I would call or email, and instead of being bogged down with me, they would pray right then and there. I'd get prayers via email and over the phone. Sometimes I would get emails letting me know they prayed and the Lord gave them verses or revelation. Often, it was the verses or encouraging word the Lord had given me. They were in agreement with the Lord, and when two or more agree, whatever they ask for is theirs. I listened to some of the prayers or read some of the emails, and I thought, "I'm glad you're on my side."

I know I must have repeated myself a hundred times or more. It felt like it, but they never fussed. They listened, let me pour out my heart, treated it tenderly. One of the things they did that opened the door for me to talk to them is that they knew when not to talk. They had no answers. There were no answers, and they didn't try to offer any. Instead, they had compassion and the wisdom to not not offer cliches or empty advice. Sometimes they would simply say, "I am so sorry this is happening. I love you."

One of the things I marvelled at through out the last few months is the ability of those I hold so close to allow me distance. The desert has so many facets to it. It's a place where survival is foremost on one's mind, and most of the time, it is utterly miserable. One of the things I have learned about survival is without God, I won't survive, so when I go into the desert, I try to make my focus God. I try to spend quiet time multiple times a day. I journal. I read the Word. I pray. I allow my body and mind to rest. For nearly a month, I took a nap every day just to be mentally and emotionally at my best.

When I "hunker down" like that, there isn't much time for email, Facebook, phones, or outside people. They are good support, but God is the only way through or out. And really, even the most amazing friends--and I have fabulous ones--can only be with you from a distance, but God is with you wholly. He is with you and in you. He understands what you can't put into words. He knows exactly what you need, and He is totally committed to getting you through the desert to a better place.

Thankfully, when the contact lessened, the commitment from my friends didn't. They gave me space to "hunker down" and God space to walk with me and to work in me. I'm sure more consistent updates--or updates at all--would have been appreciated, but they never claimed. They never pressured. They simply sent notes or left voicemail letting me know they were available when I needed them.

And I did need them. I still need them. They are my cheerleaders, my prayer warriors, the ones who hold up my hands when I'm weary, the ones who jerk me up by the collar and tell me I can do this, the ones who feed my heart and tend my spirit. They are the ones who know a well-timed, "I love you," can turn the battle. They also know silence is sometimes the best answer. And i know they are for me, with me.

They are my friends, and Job's friends who could have learned a lot from them.

Time Passes By

Time passes.

Another day of wondering what to say...and not really knowing.

How do I convey the journey I am on without sanding morose or harming the innocent or revealing too much about the not so innocent...of which, I am one. I don't know, so I say nothing...and time passes.

Then, something wondrous happens--a breakthrough, a new perspective, a light dawns. I want to tell you, but it occurs to me that it will be meaningless for you because you do not know the battle fought to win even a small victory.

Spoils mean nothing when they appear to be nothing more than items found on the road.

However, when they are hard fought, they are trophies--articles for the mantel, stories to be told, things to be bragged over.

They are the things calling forth rejoicing...over and over again...as time passes.

A phone call from a prodigal child...
Flowers from a husband with heart turned home after an absence...
A dinner filled with laughter with family once estranged...
A lick on the fingers by a pet safely returned home...
Assurance that God in Heaven is above all things, loves deeply, is ever forgiving, and desires to be gracious...

Such things made precious by the battle to win them. They are not everyday items to be acknowledged with a polite smile and forgotten. They are treasures, and they cannot be treated as less. Not now. Not as time passes...

For these are the things that keep our hearts steady. These are the times when hope is born and nourished, perserverance shows its fruits, and faith becomes solid. Such times we rail against and hate, and such times we would not trade for the treasures they bestow is worth the heart ache and tears necessary to win them.

These are the times, the gifts, the circumstances gone well, that we record in our minds and hearts. These are the ones we right on our heads and hands. These are the ones we talk about while we sit or walk along the road. These are the very things that strengthen us for the next battle, let us believe in greater spoils, and keep our hand on the sword when the war seems to be going badly. Riches pulled from the storehouse that sustain us through the next seige.

But first we have to store them...in treasure chests of journals, momentos to remind us, the hearts of precious friends. Places to draw them from when we need them.

It is easy to withdraw when the battle comes. Pride does not like to be seen struggling or in need. Explaining what is at stake or expressing the intensity of the fight can be impossible. Other's not understanding can dishearten us. But when victory comes, we want all we know to rejoice with us...even when they don't--can't--really understand.

So it is with others who wish to show their spoils.

So it is with me.

Someday soon I will share about the treasured spoils. They may seem insignificant to you. In fact, to you, they are. However, take a moment to remember your hard fought battle and the glory of your victory. The one that left you shouting joyously while tears of exhaustion and relief ran down your face. Remember that victory, and rejoice with me as though indeed this were the same...because for me, it is.

And when you bring your spoils to share, with stories to tell sharing heartbreak and exultation along the way, I'll listen. I'll be amazed. And I will put them in the storehouse of my heart where I can find them to bring out when you need them next.

That is what friends do...no matter how much time passes by...


Copyright Jerri Phillips 2009

Warfare--Sword of the Spirit, memorization

One of the things the Lord has really impressed on me for this year is the importance of memorizing scripture. I have heard many excuses for avoiding this Christian discipline. However, the reality is excuses are just that--excuses. They are a justification for our not wanting to take responsibility for doing the right thing--the thing that feeds our soul, attacks a situation, brings down mountains, and breaks forth life. The Word says the Sword of Spirit is the Word of God. Why do we make excuses for refusing to pick up a weapon so powerful that it brought for the universe in six days?

If you have chosen to pick up your sword, one way you learn to wield is by memorizing scripture. I want to share a few methods for memorizing scripture.

1. Repeating aloud. Simply read the verse aloud repeated. For people who learn by hearing, this is great.

2. Technology aided. You can record it on an iPod or MP3 player and let it play back to you. Say it as it plays. This is great if you use your iPod for exercise or copy it to a CD to play in your car on the way to work or run errands. Hit the repeat button and let it go. Listen to it and repeat aloud. After awhile, you should be able to turn off the voice or CD and simply say it alone. Again, this is great for those who learn by hearing.

3. Write it down...over and over and over. I use this method because I remember what I see or read. One of the blessings of a photographic memory. There are 3 tactics for this. I use different ones at different time.
a. Break the verse or passage up into pieces, such as sentences or phrases.
Example: My children learned this in one day.
I command you to brave and courageous.
Do not be terrified.
Do not lose hope.
I am the Lord your God.
I will be with you
in everything you do. (Joshua 1:9 NIrV)

I wrote it on the white board that way. We read it several times. Then I started erasing words.
I command you to be brave and
Do not be
Do not
I am the Lord your God.
I will be with you
in everything you do.

More words were erased.
I command you to be
Do not
Do not
I am
I will

At that point, they had it memorized. Then we simply went through it a few times each day.

By the way, they each have their own journals, and they write down the verses they memorize and the date. We are building a foundation for them, and these are part of the bricks we use.

b. I write the scripture over and over. Each time I try to write more without having to look at the text. Usually, I have to write it four or five times to make it stick, and I try to keep my focus text under five written lines. If I am doing a long passage, I do it in sections. Today I worked on James 1:2-4. I worked on verses 2 and 3 by themselves.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

Then I worked on verse 4.
Perserverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Then I put the whole section together and wrote it several times. I use a simple spiral to write these in.

c. The last method incorporate color coding. An example is:
This is what I am commanding you to do.
Be strong and brave.
Do not be terrified.
Do not lose hope.
I am the Lord your God.
I will be with you
everywhere you go.

I use this with the children a lot. I make multiple copies on the computer and put them around the house. I put one in the bathroom, by their beds, on the wall so everyone can see it from the kitchen table. You get the idea.

Our goal is one sentence at a time. Breaking them up in colors makes the bites edible and not overwhelming.

Don't forget!!!
And that brings us to my final suggestion, put it everywhere so you can review it.

My friend Debra has verses on the wall in front of her toilet.
She has them on the cabinets in her kitchen.
She puts them like posters and post cards all around her bedroom.
If you walk in the door and turn to the side, there are verses.
You cannot walk into her house or move from room to room without seeing the verses.
She also has a packet in her purse at all times.
She takes them out and read them when she is waiting for her children.
She hands them to her girls to read while they are in the car driving from place to place.

Standing Together
Find an accountability partner or two. Tell them what you are memorizing and give them (or every other day) updates. Memorization really is a daily exercise. It takes about 27 days for something to become a habit, so try to make a goal of reviewing a verse everyday for a month. You can work on multiple verses at once. Write them all down in an email to your Accountability Warrior every day. If you are doing a whole section, and it takes two weeks to memorize, then write the whole thing you have memorized each day from the time you start that passage until a month after the last part is memorized. Does that makes sense?

After a month, the passage should be concreted in your brain.

So tell me, what scripture are you memorizing? Why? What is the Lord speaking to you through the verse(s)? You can email me through my profile if you want it private or share on the comments. Make it as long as you like. You never how much a fellow warrior may need what the Father is speaking into you, so share.

Blessings, Warriors and Warriors-in-the-Making!

Remember:
This is what I command.
Be strong and brave.
Do not be terrified.
Do not lose hope.
I will be with you
everywhere you go.

Prayer for our Soldiers

Two years ago our family started supporting soldiers through Any Soldier, a soldier support organization. That year we were blessed to support some very fine soldiers, and we have been honored to keep contact with some of them. One such soldier is SGT Kevin Zuniga.

SGT Zuniga returned to Iraq in December, and we have again committed to supporting him. The requests of him and his squad are simple: letters, cookies, but most of all, prayer.

Prayer comforts their hearts, protects their bodies, and refreshes their spirits. They cannot do their job and return to "normal" life without the power of God to help them.

You do not have to visit Any Soldier or find a specific soldier who needs prayer. They all do. Please remember them in your quiet time, family prayers, and corporate prayer. And please don't forget their families as well.

Thank you.

Jericho's Walls

This is the 100th post on my Jerri Phillips blog. How wonderfully appropriate that it would deal with healing and the fall of the enemy!!!

As some of you may remember, back in February, I had symptoms indicative of a heart attack and went through a battery of tests. Thankfully, there was no heart attack. However, we were shocked when I was diagnosed with an enlarged heart. The Lord poured peace out on us, though, and we trusted Him to handle it. I watched my blood pressure, and really, there was nothing more I could do. It was up to the Lord.

A week ago Friday, I had my repeat echocardiogram to see if there were any change. Friday I went in for the results.

In short, he said it had not changed. The echo showed my left ventricle wall was thickened. The doctor asked me about my blood pressure, which is fabulous. He asked why it was elevated at his office, and I gave my explanation (it was not done with the correct protocol, but if he wanted to use the correct protocol, it would be fine). He agreed my explanation would truly explain it. Then we got into serious discussion about why the wall was thick, and we discussed my workout routine. Rob and I play tennis 3 times a week, and I walk 20-25 minutes every morning (yes, EVERY morning), and I do toning exercises every (yes, every) day. He said that could explain the thickness.

Then I brought up my bigger concern. When the nurse called in February, she said the wall was “significantly thickened”, but when the nurse called Tuesday, she said it was “slightly thickened”. There seems to be a large difference between “significant” and “slight” in my mind, so I was disappointed that there was no change. He decided to pull up the results so I could see the numbers, and he could explain better.

For those who like numbers:
Outside wall went from 1.3 to 1.1.
Septum wall sent from 1.2 to 1.0
(stuff I don't remember) 4.3 to 4.8

Those looked good to me, but then, there was a huge jump in the next number. He was quiet a moment and then said, “Uh, I have to change what I said. Your heart is a lot better. The thickness measurements have dropped, and the volume your heart is pumping has increased. Your heart is doing great. And after comparing these, I would say had I known your exercise routine and then looked at your latest results, I would say they were normal. Your heart is what it should be for your exercise load.”

I just said, “Thank the Lord.”

I asked when I needed to drop back in or have another echo, and he said, “For what? There’s nothing to check. You’re fine.”

Isn’t God absolutely amazing???!!!!!!!

So as you celebrate the season of Christmas and God’s gift of Jesus, celebrate with us this gift of healing that the Lord has given, too.

A Whole Response to the Election

Election 2008 Realities
By Jerri Phillips

In the last three days I have received numerous emails from friends concerning the results of the presidential election. Some of stated their feeling of grief, disgust, discouragement, and a range of other emotions. A few friends have stated they have been blessed with peace. All have questions.

In answer to these questions, emails from well-known speakers, leaders, and prophets are zipping through the internet and finding their way to thousands, if not millions, of email boxes across America and maybe even the world. Unfortunately, I think most of these letters only address one aspect of the election. They look back and ask what happened. We need to know. It is imperative to learn from past mistakes lest we repeat them. However, the other half of the issue is rarely considered. That being, what do we do now? If we do not have that answer, we will fail just as miserably the next time. And it is my opinion that spiritual maturity and understanding of God’s strategy and character to reveal His truth and wholeness makes it impossible to separate the necessity of the two questions.

What Happened?

1. The first question I asked the Lord was, “Were we to do more? Did we miss something? Was there a strategy that was ignored or not released?” I believe the Lord said the Remnant was strong. We were not perfect, but we were strong, and He honors that. Unfortunately, the Remnant cannot prevent the choices of the nation as a whole. Repeatedly in the Old Testament the Lord allowed the nation of Israel to go into exile and experience judgment despite the Remnant. The Remnant was blessed, and in fact, in some cases given extreme favor so that they could do the Lord’s bidding. Nehemiah and Jeremiah were two examples of favor during times of judgment.

2. The fact is the church, as a whole, handed this election away. That is not judgment. It is merely fact. There are enough Christians that had we all voted righteously, this election would have turned toward God. However, the church has fallen down at its post. Either fear of losing money or being persecuted has caused the church to grow apathetic on strong teaching. A doctrine of righteousness has been set aside for a palatable teaching of humanism. When the church refuses to address the sins of homosexuality and abortion as absolutes, conviction of “lesser sins” falls to the wayside as well.

The simple fact is, the church is not teaching righteousness as a lifestyle, and the nation is paying for it.

3. Demographics say the population that turned the tide were the people in and right around their 20s. This tells me we have an entire generation with no clear moral or spiritual compass. When clear truth is not taught, lies are given room to flourish. We will now reap the fruit of flourishing lies.

4. The church is too short-sighted. We cannot think that we can fast for a month every four years and turn this nation toward God. That is even more naïve than thinking Christianity is a Sunday lifestyle. Both are roads to hell. And yet, the short-sightedness is not being addressed in the church.

We are in danger now, not just because we lost a war for president but because we have not been fighting the ward for the House or the Senate. We have not been fighting the war for our state and local governments. Had we not lost the House and Senate in the last elections, would Barack Obama have as much power as he does now? Perhaps, but at least there would be road blocks in the way to slow him down or prevent some of the devastation he has planned for our country. We have got to stop being naïve and believing we can rush to the battle lines when the enemy is at the gate. We have to stop thinking defensively and start thinking offensively. We have to see that the governors or senators who have no fear of God today could be our president in 8 or 12 years. The church cannot afford to sit naively by hoping for disaster to pass. The Passover was an event of action, not passivity, but the church seems to think if we all smile and think happy thoughts we will be protected. We are wrong.

We must have a larger vision and a long-term strategy.

What now?

1. We must refuse the apathy that comes with the clichés the church likes to toss around. “God is still on His throne.” Yes. “God is not shocked.” No. However, God was on His throne when He told Israel to take the Promised Land with strategies of war, some were physical, some not. God was on His throne when David fought viciously against the enemies of God. Being a Christian is not a passivity that waits for God to toss good things in our laps. Being a Christian is an active lifestyle that understands warriors do not stand around wearing an armor of God (Ephesians 6) but rather uses that armor to advance the Kingdom of God.

Apathy is what got us here in the first place. Let us not be fooled into thinking it will get us out.

2. We lost a battle, but we need to learn from what happened.

There is an entire generation of people who have no moral or spiritual compass.
There are people in the church who do not understand the precepts of blesses and curses. They do not understand that God is the one who blesses, not a politician.
We cannot afford to wait and whine another four years and do nothing.

Yes, we lost this battle huge. However, we can learn the strategies of the enemy and turn them back on him. We have to think war-oriented thoughts, not battle thoughts.

3. We need to seek the Lord on the strategy now. No one will convince me the outcome of this election was God’s will, and no one will convince me it is hopeless either. We have a hard battle ahead. Don’t be fooled into thinking otherwise. However, we also have a battle tested King, who has a strategy for the Kingdom. We need to ask Him what our part is and do it. It is not enough to know the strategy. We must be obedient, and it cannot be only during the election. It must be everyday of our lives. The war for this election wasn’t only lost in 2007 and 2008. It was lost on many battlefields. It was lost:
--when the church did not stand against a young man who would be known as the most liberal senator in the nation.
--when a liberal president forced banks to make loans that were errant.
--when leaders in the financial area of America were allowed to act at will rather than being laid on the Lord’s altar in prayer.
--when the Senate and Congress were given over to liberal leaders rather than righteous ones

Make no mistake. This is not about a political party. This is about righteous that has fallen under foot of humanistic thinking that promises promotion and prosperity without responsibility. How do we stand against that?

How do we turn the hearts or our governing bodies to God?
How do we turn the hearts of our church goers to God?
How do we reach the lost generations?

What is the Lord’s strategy for dealing with these issues and others that we may not realize?

I have said in many of my emails that I am not shaken. I’m not. My faith in God is not shaken. My faith in His character I not shaken. All this has done is make me more determined. It has given me greater focus and clearer vision. It has revealed the vessels of the enemy, and allowed me to see him more clearly. I believe my God will use this for his downfall, not his glory. As a warrior for the army of God, I have not stood down, and I will not. I encourage you to be of the same mind.

We lost this battle. However, it is not time to slink away and hide in shame. It is time to go before the King and ask, “What now?” and do it.

Stand strong, warriors.

Blessings,

Jerri Phillips
www.jerriphillips.net


Copyright Jerri Phillips 2008

God's Word is the Only One that Matters

Last night when I arrived home from my small group, I saw the news that Obama was voted in as President. I don't know that I can articulate the conversation the Lord and I had. It doesn't really matter anyway because He reminded me of a vision and word He gave me months ago. I shared it with a few friends then, and I share it with you now because I think it is pertinent and will encourage some of you.

As I was praying over the Democratic choice of candidates, He gave me a word for Hilary and told me how to pray for her. He also gave me a vision for Obama.

First, the Lord said the leadership of this country goes the way of the prayers of this country. Folks, that puts the power back in our hands.

Second, I saw Obama walking down one road, and the road forked. He took the right fork.

Did you get that? He took THE RIGHT fork. Our prayers or lack thereof determine the path of the king because our prayers and our faith release the power of the the KING.

I know it is easy to see this as chaotic, a defeat, and mortifying. I have said it before, and I will say it again, God is bigger than Barack Obama. The army that stands with us is greater than the army that stands against us. We are not defeated. We may not like the giant that stands before us, but it will still fall if we are faithful to stand in our authority.

I want to leave you with one last thought.

The Lord said the real warriors are the ones that stand—not because it looks like they’ll win—but because they believe in their cause too much to accept losing.

Keep standing.

Refusing to stand down,
Jerri

Warfare--Helmet of Salvation

This morning I was praying, and as so many others, I felt the weight of the deception that says this election is lost. I immediately took it to the Lord and confessed it. He told me to put on my armor and stand.

That is what we tend to say, but do we know what it means?

First, the helmet of salvation. What is that, and what kind of weaponry does it offer? The helmet covers our head and protects our brain-the part of us that thinks and responds. Simple. The Salvation aspect means we will think and respond as someone who understands the power in the sacrifice of Christ that bought our salvation. Often we try to make this much more complicated than it is.

Salvation is the defeat of the enemy’s work in our spirits and lives. Period. Salvation means the power of the devil is broken at the very core level of our identity. Simple.

If Christ’s death defeats Satan in our spirits and lives, He must render him powerless in every other way and in every other circumstance.

The KEY is our choice to think, act, and respond accordingly. Salvation does not mean we no longer have self will. It means we are no longer prisoners.

Authority does not mean we cannot hand our spoils over to the enemy as Hezekiah did in the Old Testament, but it means when we choose to stand our ground, our grounds is ours.

What does this have to do with the election? If we believe the same God who loves us so much wants the best for us, wants to lead us in paths of righteousness, wants to give us a godly leader, wants us to use our authority to hold our ground and set free prisoners and captives, we will act, think, and respond accordingly.

We will spend time in prayer. We will fast. We will not give in to the weight of the deception but trust God for a turn around.

Look, folks, there was a Friday when the earth was dark. Folks declared things hopeless. The ultimate battle had been lost. Only two days later, on Sunday atonement was fully declared for all who believed.

Salvation says, “I’ll believe it when I can’t see it.”
I didn’t see Jesus die, but I believe He did.
I didn’t see my sins wiped clean, but I believe they were.
I didn’t see my name written in the Lamb’s book of Life, but I believe it was.
I believe the same God who rendered Satan powerless at a tomb can do it in the elections in November.

Praying daily to keep my helmet on straight and align my thoughts with His….
Jerri

Copyright Jerri Phillips 2008

The Warrior Series--Wielding the Sword

A sword in its sheath does no good. It's just ornamental at that point, so is a Bible that lies on the table or sits on a shelf and gathers dust. If you want the Bible to do you good, you have to take it out, open it up, and learn to use its cutting edge.

Sometimes that edge is used by the Lord to correct us and set us free from our own destructive behavior or the prison we have created for ourselves by through sin habits, rebellion, or simple ignorance (Isaiah 61). However, for now, I want to focus on the Sword as our weapon of offense.

A sword is not a defensive weapon. A sword is something used for offensive attack. That may sound odd to some, but think of it this way: if your whole purpose for using your sword is defensive, you will ultimately lose the fight because your enemy will pummel you until you are exhausted and fall. Instead, you use the sword to attack your enemy, drive him back, or destroy him, thus, freeing you from the attack. Now you can stand, walk, and move at will. The sword is an offensive weapon.

The Word of God is an offensive weapon, too. It is not there for us to hide behind but rather for us to use to drive back the enemy (Deuteronomy 33:27), set free captives (Isaiah 61), and usher in the kingdom of God to this earth (Matthew 6:10) . However, for it to be effective, it must be taken out of its sheath.

There are several ways to make the Sword useful, but they all start in one place--the Word.

For years I've had people tell me they cannot be warriors because they don't know the Word. I have gotten phone calls from folks, been taken out to lunch, received emails--the whole gamut--by people who want help, need help. However, they aren't like me. They don't know the Bible like I do. They can't quote the Bible like I do. they just don't know all those verses.

That just tells me they do not make reading and learning the Word a priority.

It is like a soldier in gun fight hiding his head between his knees depending on all the other soldiers to defend him because although he has a gun loaded with powerful bullets sitting beside him, he chose not to learn to use it. Most of us think that is crazy. Christians do it all the time.

So, let's figure out how to make this Sword that created a universe in six days work for us.

Taking hold of the Sword--finding what pertains to us.

1. Read. Read. Read. For three years I read the Bible through each year. I learned tons. To read the Bible through in a year, you only need to read 4 chapters a day. I made it easier for me and read 5. By simply reading the Word, you learn the marvelous acts of God, see miracles (like when the dead body of a prophet was tossed in a grave in haste and the bones he landed on came back to life, very cool story), and learn God's heart. You also find out just how far God is willing to go because He loves you and some of the things He won't put up with at all.

If you read enough, eventually, you can simply pull things from memory.

2. Word Studies. This is not as daunting as it may sound. You can use a concordance, which is the list of words in the back of your bible (or that huge volume of Strong's Concordance), to look up a topic and then read the verses associated with it. The concordance is good because it gives a few words of the sentence and it isn't overwhelming. The negative is that it is not exhaustive.

If you want all the verses, use a software program such as Bible Gateway. It also lets you easily change translations or even compare them.

One of the common questions I receive is, "What if I can't find the word I am looking for?" Good question. When I battled depression, I couldn't find the word depression in there, BUT I found words like despair, hope, darkness, healing. Look at both the synonym and antonym. The verse might say, "You set me free from my despair," OR it might say, "You gave me hope." Both may be what you need, so look for both "sides" of the situation or word. I use http://www.thesaurus.com/ to find synonyms and antonyms. Just type in a word and hit enter.

Holding the Sword--Being Armed with the Word

1. Memorization--There are several methods for this.
a. Read, read, read.--Pick a passage or a verse and read it over and over and over. Eventually, your mind won't need the paper anymoe.
b. Concentrated time--Sit down with the verse or passage on paper and work on it until you get it. Do this several days in a row, though, so your mind doesn't think you were joking.
c. In reverse--Write the verse or passage on a paper or dry erase board and take out one word at a time (with the children, I do one or two a day) and read the passage over and over until you no longer need that word. Then take out another word.
Example: The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want.
The _____ is my shepherd I shall not want.
The _____ is my shepherd I shall not _____.
You get the idea.

2. In your face.--Also known as Notecard Mania.
I have put posters of verses on my wall or papers with verses, but my friend Debra took this to a life-altering level. When the enemy threatened her family, she loaded up on the notecards. She wrote verses on them and put them everywhere--her daughters' bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen, the laundry room, her bedroom, the living room. You couldn't walk into her house without seeing a notecard with a verse. And when she left, she took her baggie of notecards. When her daughters had a bad day, they pulled the notecards out and read them aloud. When Debra had a bad day, she pulled the notecards out and read them aloud. They not only kept the Word before them, they released it into the heavenlies. The Lord says, "My word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it (Isaiah 55:11)."

Using the Sword--Declaring, Proclaiming, and Praying

I talked about this in a different post, so I'll only hit the highlights. The Bible says every promise by God is yes and amen in Christ (2 Corinthians 1:20). That means every promise He has made in the Bible, He made to YOU, too.
He promised forgiveness. That is for you.
He promised healing. That is for you.
He promised to be a rock, fortress, and shepherd. That is for you.

When pray verses over you or declare and proclaim God's promises, you are not burdening God or being a pest. Intead, what you are doing is saying, "God, you made this promise, and I trust your character enough to know you are going ot keep, that in fact, you want to keep it. I choose to agree with you so you can do that."

Jeremiah 29:11 says, "I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." The enemy will tell you God is waiting for you to do something wrong, so He can smash you. The enemy will tell you God enjoys watching you be miserable. However, this promise if for YOU, and you can declare it over your own life.

"The Lord has plans for me. His plans are to prosper me--not to do me hard. He plans to give me hope and a future, and I receive His good plans. I receive His hope. I receive His future, and I praise Him for His goodness toward me. I rejoice in the goodness and the love of Almighty God."

Go yell it from your back porch (Yes, I've done that. No community comments, and it did make a difference in the circumstance). If you are having problems in your work place, go in there and start praying that verse while walking around the desks or standing outside your boss' office. If your marriage is struggling, you walk around your house and pray this. Lay your hands on your bed and pillows and pray this. Is your child making some questionable choices? Go in their room and pray this: "I know the plans my God has for this child..." Pray it every morning, noon, and night if you have to, but don't you let the enemy steal from you, and don't you buy his lies.

You have the power of Almighty God. It's His Word, and He has handed you the Sword. Yes, it is there to defend you, but its primary purpose is to defeat the enemy. So, Warrior, get out that Sword, get it polished up, and take what God has promised you.

Copyright Jerri Phillips 2008

The Warrior Series--Praying the Word

I grew up in church. We had a real altar that we actually knelt at, and sometimes we stayed there the whole service. I organized 24-hour prayer chains. I prayed for lengthy spans of time.

I am no stranger to prayer.

I believe God hears sincere prayers. I don't think they have to be fancy or lengthy. I've hydroplaned in my little aluminum Toyota with a large 4-wheel drive in front of me that actually stopped at the red light. My prayer went something like, "Oh, God!" I drove home a bit shaken and a lot slower but without mishap.

Some folks tell me they don't know how to pray. I tell them it is simply talking to God and letting Him talk back. Really. That's it, and I believe the Lord honors that. I know He does. I think God enjoys simple conversation.

Sometimes, though, simple conversation isn't what we need. Sometimes circumstances demand more than a casual, "If you think about it, it would be nice." Sometimes the battle is intense, and the situation requires the big guns.

When that happens, pull out your sword. In Ephesians 6, we are told the Sword is the Word of God. Let's understand the power of this Sword. The Word of God created an entire universe in 6 days. It called people back from the dead, and it took out a giant with a stone. The Word of God closed the mouths of lions, walked three young men through a fire, and opened a sea for millions of people to walk through.

Tell me anything in your life that is bigger than any of that.

So, now that we have perspective, let's find out how to wield this Sword.

Right now I am praying over some terminal diagnoses for three people. They need healing. I don't even ask if it is God's will. God say, "Don't eat the fruit, or you'll die." Sounds like God is all about life to me, so I'm going with that. You don't have to agree but don't expect me to change my mind.

I went to http://www.biblegateway.com/ and put the word "heal" into the blank. It brought up 182 references for the NIV. I copied that list to a Word document, and then I started deleting anything I didn't feel fit my needs. When I was done, I had 7 pages of scriptures.

Then I sat on my deck, which is my prayer perch, and I started praying scripture over these people by inserting their names. Anna had a head cold earlier this week, and I did the same for her.

Here are just a few from Matthew:

Matthew 4:23[ Jesus Heals the Sick ] Jesus went throughout Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom, and healing every disease and sickness Anna had. {among the people}.

Matthew 4:24News about him spread all over Syria, and Jerri brought to him all {Anna} who were ill with various diseases, those suffering severe pain, the demon-possessed, those having seizures, and the paralyzed, and he healed her.

Matthew 9:35[ The Workers Are Few ] Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom and healing every Anna's disease and sickness.
Matthew 10:1[ Jesus Sends Out the Twelve ] He called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority to drive out evil spirits and to heal every disease and sickness of Anna's.

Matthew 10:8Heal the sick {Anna}, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons. Freely you have received, freely give.

You get the idea.

Maybe the issue is a prodigal. I have one right now I am praying for. I pray verses like, "It is not the will of God that (my prodigal) should perish but that he should turn from his ways and be saved." I read the story of The Prodigal where God is standing in the yard watching for My Prodigal, and My Prodigal comes home, and instead of a cranky brother, I put me in there with tears ready to kill every fatted calf we own in celebration.

If you aren't where you use a computer program, look verses up in your Bible in from the concordance in the back. One lady I know has a small book that fits in her purse, and it has a myriad of promises in it for different situations. When she needs to pray on the fly, she whips out that book, and she rips the doors of Heaven off their hinges calling forth the will of God.

Every wonder how folks can do that off the top of their heads? They read the Bible a lot, and they pray those verses at home from their prayer perch. They just have them memorized from use.

The Sword is for every believer. It isn't for the super spiritual. It is for the one who has the guts to believe for better things and to believe God wants to give them.

I Said It's Mine

I know I have already blogged today. However, I need to blog again. It isn't that my heart is burning with some great emotion either positive or negative that compels me to write. It is the fact that I am so strongly compelled not to write that drives me to my keyboard.

Some of you know what I mean. Some of you are rereading that sentence for the fourth time trying to figure out the logic, thinking you missed a word or two. You didn't.

For several months now I have pretty much avoided creative blogging. For months now I knew what the Lord was bringing me to. The edge of the mountain that required faith to leap from the precipice and fly was coming. I am standing on the edge, and I am ready to fly. Im fact, I believe I have leaped, and now I am trying to figure out how to make my wings work.

I do not fear falling. Either God will catch me, or He'll pick me up and dust me off when I hit bottom. Either way, I'm okay.

I simply feel awkward. Perhaps it is an adolescent stage for dreams in which one knows a new expertise is necessary but the experience to wield it isn't there yet.

On December 31st, I posted "Mine". It is simply part of Joshua 1. This is the word the Lord gave me for the year. It is my promise, my challenge, my compass. The enemy tried to steal it from me by whispering that it was too good to be true, I was hearing what I wanted to hear. I told him to talk to my Daddy, and I simply asked the Lord to confirm His word or correct it. That night I was at church speaking with a friend, and he said, "This is a year when dreams come true. In fact, such incredible things are going to come true that they are not even dreams. They are so far beyond what we have the daring to hope for that they are beyond fantasy." I took that as confirmation.

I have a lot of dreams. I have dreams for my marriage, my family, for writing, speaking, photography. Do I think all of them will come true this year? I think things will happen that are so incredible I didn't even have the courage to think about them.

I can say with great rejoicing that I am already seeing those dreams come to pass, and I am disciplining myself accordingly to receive the other dreams. I am also being hit with opposition. It's not a shock. The Israelites didn't take the Promised Land by walking in one day and everyone giving them the keys to the cities, BUT, everyone that was overtaken knew the power of God was with the Israelites. As a result, they feared them. I believe the enemy knows he has had ground for a long time that is no longer his, and he fears this. Still, he is going to fight to keep hold of his land, even when he knows it is pointless.

The enemy's attack takes many forms. Some of you reading this have already experienced it. For me, the assault sounds like this: You have nothing to write about. You can go to the writer's groups and conferences. You can learn the technical stuff, but you have nothing to write about. The Lord hasn't given you a topic or an outline. You have nothing. You're going to get to November and have nothing. Then what? Where did all your ideas go? They're gone. You know why? Because they weren't of God. You have nothing.

Seriously. That is what I've been hearing for over two months over my writing, speaking, and photography. The attack to steal my promises for my marriage and family are worse, and the last two weeks have been incredibly intense. However, the nagging attack that make me want to avoid my computer are in the areas of writing, photography, and speaking.

For instance, I need to turn something in for critique for my writer's group in two weeks, and my mind is blank. I have been avoiding my blog because my mind seems so blank.

But here is something I've seen over and over in God's Word and in my life: God is good at filling empty.

Look at the widow who needed to pay her debts. Her oil didn't pour out until her debt was paid.
Look at the woman who was going to make bread for her son and herself and die. Instead, she made bread for the prophet, and it lasted through the famine.
Look at the miracles Jesus did. They weren't powerful because of what people had but because of what they needed.
The Lord told Paul, "In your weakness, my strength is evident."

The enemy is trying to get me focused on my weakness. He's right. Jerri Phillips has nothing--no, that isn't true. I have something.

I have the promise of the King.

I have God Almighty's word--or God's almighty word. The voice that spoke the world into being out of nothing has spoken His creative word into my personal nothing, and life beyond what I can fathom, that will reach beyond my realms of knowing, that will continue to expand according to His purpose has been declared into existence. It is as real as the computer I'm typing on.

My only weakness that matters is the weakness to see His power. Refusal to see the Lord's power is what killed the Israelites in the desert. He hasn't told me I'll die in the desert. He's told me, "It's time to take the land."

The enemy wants me to believe I don't know what to say, but I do.

"It's time to cross over because by the word of the Almighty God, this land is mine."

Joshua 1

3 I will give you every place where you set your foot, as I promised Moses. 4 Your territory will extend from the desert to Lebanon, and from the great river, the Euphrates—all the Hittite country—to the Great Sea on the west. 5 No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.

6 "Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. 7 Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. 8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

10 So Joshua ordered the officers of the people: 11 "Go through the camp and tell the people, 'Get your supplies ready. Three days from now you will cross the Jordan here to go in and take possession of the land the LORD your God is giving you for your own.' "