Believe it or not, I have no doubt God has a purpose. I have no doubt of His love, mercy, or grace. I don't understand this week, but I have not understood most of the last 8 months...except that He continues to take care of the children and me.
But I will also tell you this, I am shell shocked. I do not even know what to pray, little less how to pray it. I keep remembering verses about "those who call on the name of the Lord". Thankfully, it is not "those with eloquent prayers made up of perfect words," because I have no words beyond, "Oh, holy God..." And my voice trails off because I am at a loss, but then maybe, as long as I know to start with Him I am not as lost as I thought.