I'm tired. I'm so tired I ache. It isn't so much what I did today either. It is what I have done for the last three days. On Sunday WonderMan and I worked in the yard. We got lots of good work done, and I got some plants rearranged and my seeds down in one bed before the rain started Sunday night. That was good. My back, however, wasn't thrilled. Yesterday the children and I spent over three hours doing errands and buying groceries. It really wasn't a hard day, but with an already tender back, it had some rough consequences last night. Today, the children made banana bread, and I swept up after them and swept the other tile floors in the house. I also did some work in the sun room. When I realized I couldn't get everything organized I needed put away, I decided to make the much needed shelves. WonderMan had already cut the wood. It simply needed to be screwed together and painted. The children helped, which was a blessing, but it still meant a lot of bending and stooping, and now, I am paying the price for my industrious efforts.
If I continue at this pace, I could end up with bulging discs again. I spent 8 weeks in misery before because I didn't know when to quit pushing my limits. I still deal with consequences of that delusional perception of immortality.
Too often I think we don't realize the effects of seemingly negligible behavior. Physically, as an athlete, I was taught a real athletes plays with pain and never gripes. Real athletes also often face surgeries, life-time pain, and drug problems due to damage that cannot be fixed. While I believe God used basketball as part of my sanity, I still find it a highly questionable risk.
Spiritually, we risk far more when we begin to dabble in areas that seem inconsequential. One flirtatious joke. One date with someone who doesn't share our values. One trip to that club on the outskirts of town because that is where everyone at the office is going. One lie about one's income. One. Just one. I spent one day working in the flower beds. Did it ruin my back? No, but it sure made it susceptible to further injury. The problem is, though, I develop a false security. One time didn't hurt me. Surely I'll be fine doing this. Then comes the rationalization and the second time.
The second joke. The second date. Second trip to the club. The second lie.
Still, I'm a little sore, but I'm doing okay, and it felt good to get those things done. Just like the flirting feels good. The attention feels good. Watching those women (or men) feels good. Having a bigger bank account feels good.
At what point does the delusion that I am doing no damage stop? When I am in an MRI machine finding out whether I'll need surgery? When the flirting becomes kissing or when the kissing becomes intercourse? When the date becomes adulterous or an unequally yoked marriage? Maybe when the fantasies make it nearly impossible to work or maybe when your wife-or worse, your child-finds the porn on your computer or under your bed? Before or after the IRS audits you and takes all you own or sends you to jail?
It doesn't even have to be "the big stuff" listed above. Shopping, eating, coffee with the girls, cleaning, not cleaning...Anything that takes your heart from God and the ministry He has for you both inside your house and has to be seen for what it is. It is sin, and sin leads to destruction.
It destroys families, children, relationships, companies...individuals.
When does the reality of the consequences of our actions become painful enough that we can no longer ignore, but instead, we acknowledge the pain and destruction we are causing and repent of our ways?
Tonight I am taking time to listen to my back. It says my behavior is destructive. I can listen now or be forced to deal with the consequences of my behavior later. Destructive behavior cannot be ignored forever.
Praying the Quiet Voice whispers loud enough that I can never ignore it...and never want to...
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Thursday, March 8, 2007
I've Fallen, and I Can't Get Up on my Own
I have this tendency not to write when life becomes "intense", which really means when I feel I am spending more time picking gravel out of my knees because I just fell again than I am actually moving forward.
My friend Iona is amazing to me. She can be so completely transparent about her victories, encouragement, discouragement, and failings. Today I was reading a book by Lisa Whelchel (www.LisaWhelchel.com), and she talked about her failings and weaknesses a lot more openly than most folks I know. Folks who can lay their heart out there for all to see amaze me.
Now, the irony is that I have been told repeatedly that the strength of my writing is in my willingness to be transparent and vulnerable. People want to know they are not the only ones who struggle, tumble, and pick gravel from their knees. Of course, I can only speak for me, but I like to know I'm not in this struggle alone, and I doubt I am the only one who feels that way.
As I sat here and thought about that, I think there are primarily two groups of people who like to know they are not alone in the "gravel picking" department. I think the first group likes to point at others' failures and use them as excuses for how they are. Perhaps that is cynical. I tend to think some folks call things cynical because the truth of the statement hits too close to home, but then, I could be cynical about that as well. Anyway, the second group that likes to know they aren't alone in picking gravel are the ones who desire to be the best they can be, to be a good and faithful servant. Sometimes it is nice to know that even those who "have it all together" really don't. It gives us hope that we are not beyond change. It helps us be encouraged that someday we won't trip over that same rock...again. Somehow knowing others struggle make us feel less like failures and more like works in progress.
In theory, we shouldn't need anyone else to help us with that. The Bible says that He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it (Philippians 1:6). Paul says he moves forward to take hold of the prize, not that he already has, but that he is in the process (Philippians 3). In fact, Paul says the following:
8 What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ 9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. 10 I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
15All of us who are mature should take such a view of things..."
Yesterday was one of those days that left me lying face down on the path to eternity, and while it involved an abundance of humility, it was not an act of worship that put me there.
Simply stated, things that were unresolved built up to ungodly levels (Note that if things are not addressed and settled to the glory of God, they are unresolved at an ungodly level, so we had long since taken a flying leap into ungodly levels of unresolved issues). The result was an even more ungodly explosion of anger, hurt, and accusations. Beloved Husband is out of town, so he didn't see the full display, but he heard it. By the time the children went to bed, they had ample opportunity to witness Mommy repenting and explaining that even when someone hurts you or makes you angry, voices elevated to high decibel levels are not the way to handle the situation. The children were forgiving. Beloved Hubby understood the root issues and was forgiving, and when the dust had settled, I lay in the floor and cried.
I hadn't just stumbled. I had taken a header, and from what I could see, I was pretty disfigured. I emailed my friend MaryB and confessed everything. She was loving and kind, and then said the most Realistic thing she could. She said, "But I say, 'Get up. He sees your tears. He knows your humanity. He also knows your familiy's humanity. And He loves because He truly knows YOU.'"
Sounds a lot like Paul, in my opinion. Perhaps Paul's words could be paraphrased, "Instead of lying on the floor crying because I blew it, I get up and move on because I know my righteousness is not dependent on my ability because I have none. My righteousness is dependent on my faith in Christ Jesus who has already become righteousness for me. He is already my perfection, and I am in the process of becoming like Him. I'm not like Him yet, and I won't get there by lying on the floor crying. I choose to press on with faith in Him to make me who He has said I am."
So I embraced Mary's directive, and I got off the floor. I blew it yesterday. I blew it some today. I'm in the process.
You know what really makes me stop and think, though? What utterly fascinates me in all this is my real role in this process. Do you notice that Paul never mentions what he can do to overcome all of his failures? Paul has no four-point plan on how to modify his behavior or stop committing a particular sin. To the contrary, Paul says he recognizes that he will never achieve anything on his own, and his solution is not to "modify" the flesh but to let it die. In fact, Paul considers any effort he can make for his own righteousness to be rubbish, and instead, longs to embrace the absolute necessity of righteousness through Christ as the only means to eternal life. Paul is completely convinced he can do nothing for himself.
So where does change come from? In the two scriptures I just mentioned, we find two simple answers:
1. Dying with Christ and taking His righteousness.
2. Letting God do His job and get out of His way. Notice that Paul does not say, "And if you work really hard, you'll finally get there." No, Paul said that the Father, who began a good work in you, is faithful to complete it.
The last thing I want to mention as a necessity is the filling and leading of the Holy Spirit. Romans 12: 1 and 2 say, " 1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. 2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. "
How is your mind renewed?
1. Dying to yourself and living in Christ.
2. Letting God do His work in you.
3. Letting the Holy Spirit lead you into all truth (John 16:13).
I won't tell you it is an easy journey. It's not. It hurts. If it were easy, every human being would be flocking to it. However, if you want answers, I got those. I have ALL the answers because I know there is only one Answer, and even when I am lying on my face in the gravel where I just fell over the most obvious rock in the world, He is still the Answer, and when I call to Him, He is faithful to answer.
Praying you remeber that even when the questions are hard or you think you might be bombing your test, there is only one Answer, and He is faithful to answer you when you call to Him...
My friend Iona is amazing to me. She can be so completely transparent about her victories, encouragement, discouragement, and failings. Today I was reading a book by Lisa Whelchel (www.LisaWhelchel.com), and she talked about her failings and weaknesses a lot more openly than most folks I know. Folks who can lay their heart out there for all to see amaze me.
Now, the irony is that I have been told repeatedly that the strength of my writing is in my willingness to be transparent and vulnerable. People want to know they are not the only ones who struggle, tumble, and pick gravel from their knees. Of course, I can only speak for me, but I like to know I'm not in this struggle alone, and I doubt I am the only one who feels that way.
As I sat here and thought about that, I think there are primarily two groups of people who like to know they are not alone in the "gravel picking" department. I think the first group likes to point at others' failures and use them as excuses for how they are. Perhaps that is cynical. I tend to think some folks call things cynical because the truth of the statement hits too close to home, but then, I could be cynical about that as well. Anyway, the second group that likes to know they aren't alone in picking gravel are the ones who desire to be the best they can be, to be a good and faithful servant. Sometimes it is nice to know that even those who "have it all together" really don't. It gives us hope that we are not beyond change. It helps us be encouraged that someday we won't trip over that same rock...again. Somehow knowing others struggle make us feel less like failures and more like works in progress.
In theory, we shouldn't need anyone else to help us with that. The Bible says that He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it (Philippians 1:6). Paul says he moves forward to take hold of the prize, not that he already has, but that he is in the process (Philippians 3). In fact, Paul says the following:
8 What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ 9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. 10 I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
15All of us who are mature should take such a view of things..."
Yesterday was one of those days that left me lying face down on the path to eternity, and while it involved an abundance of humility, it was not an act of worship that put me there.
Simply stated, things that were unresolved built up to ungodly levels (Note that if things are not addressed and settled to the glory of God, they are unresolved at an ungodly level, so we had long since taken a flying leap into ungodly levels of unresolved issues). The result was an even more ungodly explosion of anger, hurt, and accusations. Beloved Husband is out of town, so he didn't see the full display, but he heard it. By the time the children went to bed, they had ample opportunity to witness Mommy repenting and explaining that even when someone hurts you or makes you angry, voices elevated to high decibel levels are not the way to handle the situation. The children were forgiving. Beloved Hubby understood the root issues and was forgiving, and when the dust had settled, I lay in the floor and cried.
I hadn't just stumbled. I had taken a header, and from what I could see, I was pretty disfigured. I emailed my friend MaryB and confessed everything. She was loving and kind, and then said the most Realistic thing she could. She said, "But I say, 'Get up. He sees your tears. He knows your humanity. He also knows your familiy's humanity. And He loves because He truly knows YOU.'"
Sounds a lot like Paul, in my opinion. Perhaps Paul's words could be paraphrased, "Instead of lying on the floor crying because I blew it, I get up and move on because I know my righteousness is not dependent on my ability because I have none. My righteousness is dependent on my faith in Christ Jesus who has already become righteousness for me. He is already my perfection, and I am in the process of becoming like Him. I'm not like Him yet, and I won't get there by lying on the floor crying. I choose to press on with faith in Him to make me who He has said I am."
So I embraced Mary's directive, and I got off the floor. I blew it yesterday. I blew it some today. I'm in the process.
You know what really makes me stop and think, though? What utterly fascinates me in all this is my real role in this process. Do you notice that Paul never mentions what he can do to overcome all of his failures? Paul has no four-point plan on how to modify his behavior or stop committing a particular sin. To the contrary, Paul says he recognizes that he will never achieve anything on his own, and his solution is not to "modify" the flesh but to let it die. In fact, Paul considers any effort he can make for his own righteousness to be rubbish, and instead, longs to embrace the absolute necessity of righteousness through Christ as the only means to eternal life. Paul is completely convinced he can do nothing for himself.
So where does change come from? In the two scriptures I just mentioned, we find two simple answers:
1. Dying with Christ and taking His righteousness.
2. Letting God do His job and get out of His way. Notice that Paul does not say, "And if you work really hard, you'll finally get there." No, Paul said that the Father, who began a good work in you, is faithful to complete it.
The last thing I want to mention as a necessity is the filling and leading of the Holy Spirit. Romans 12: 1 and 2 say, " 1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. 2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. "
How is your mind renewed?
1. Dying to yourself and living in Christ.
2. Letting God do His work in you.
3. Letting the Holy Spirit lead you into all truth (John 16:13).
I won't tell you it is an easy journey. It's not. It hurts. If it were easy, every human being would be flocking to it. However, if you want answers, I got those. I have ALL the answers because I know there is only one Answer, and even when I am lying on my face in the gravel where I just fell over the most obvious rock in the world, He is still the Answer, and when I call to Him, He is faithful to answer.
Praying you remeber that even when the questions are hard or you think you might be bombing your test, there is only one Answer, and He is faithful to answer you when you call to Him...
Monday, February 26, 2007
Value
Last Tuesday Wondergirl and I worked with a team of wonderful ladies who form an outreach team for our church. We go where needed to help other ladies with a variety of things around the home. The needs vary from cleaning to painting to light repair work. Last week we helped a wonderful lady who was just feeling a bit overwhelmed by the first spring without her husband who passed on last fall. Talk about a joy. Mrs. J was an absolute delight! That was so much fun.
Tomorrow we help another team paint a kitchen. I cannot tell you how much this thrills us. First of all, we are working with some of the most wonderful women you could ever want to meet. Second, it is a joy to have WonderGirl with me. She has such a heart of service, and it shows. I really enjoy her, and I cannot tell you how much it blesses me that others enjoy her, too. She is just completely precious. Third, we love this stuff! I know it sounds weird, but we love hanging with others and loving on folk. Does life get better than that?
Tomorrow is also very thrilling for me because we are using it as a "pilot program". Sarah, the director, and I are praying that the Lord uses this outreach to help bring families together. We are hoping to develop an outreach team of moms and children.
Today I had a chance to talk to Sarah, and she asked me what my vision for this group is. I shared my heart as I could articulate it at the moment. In short, my desire is to help families learn to work as a unit and not cohabitate as a bunch of individuals. Simple enough.
On a larger scale, though, I want to see healing in families on a group as well as individual level. I find it sad and disturbing that so many people in this world do not know the simple concept of value. It is my heart for each person to realize God created each of them with more value than we can imagine. As individuals, we are invaluable, and society is good at capitalizing on the idea that we each have a call and each have gifts. Too often we become so caught up in our individual value that we miss the joy of our value within the groups of those who love us, those with whom we share our lives. We become so focused on our individual jobs, responsibilities, and goals that we forget that we are also put within our families because God has a plan not only to raise godly offspring but to bless and impact this world with our families as a whole.
God looked at Adam and said it wasn't good for man to be alone. Adam needed a helper. He needed to be part of something larger than himself and what he was able to do. That has not changed. We all need helpers, and we all need to be a helper. The family is the perfect place for that to happen, but it will only happen when we realize the value of those involved and act in accordance with that truth.
I think if I could give people anything in the world, save salvation of course, it would be the knowledge of how valuable they are and how much value they are able to speak into others' lives.
Prayerfully, our outreach group will demonstrate our value of people, not just the owners of the home where we work but the value of those working as well....
Tomorrow we help another team paint a kitchen. I cannot tell you how much this thrills us. First of all, we are working with some of the most wonderful women you could ever want to meet. Second, it is a joy to have WonderGirl with me. She has such a heart of service, and it shows. I really enjoy her, and I cannot tell you how much it blesses me that others enjoy her, too. She is just completely precious. Third, we love this stuff! I know it sounds weird, but we love hanging with others and loving on folk. Does life get better than that?
Tomorrow is also very thrilling for me because we are using it as a "pilot program". Sarah, the director, and I are praying that the Lord uses this outreach to help bring families together. We are hoping to develop an outreach team of moms and children.
Today I had a chance to talk to Sarah, and she asked me what my vision for this group is. I shared my heart as I could articulate it at the moment. In short, my desire is to help families learn to work as a unit and not cohabitate as a bunch of individuals. Simple enough.
On a larger scale, though, I want to see healing in families on a group as well as individual level. I find it sad and disturbing that so many people in this world do not know the simple concept of value. It is my heart for each person to realize God created each of them with more value than we can imagine. As individuals, we are invaluable, and society is good at capitalizing on the idea that we each have a call and each have gifts. Too often we become so caught up in our individual value that we miss the joy of our value within the groups of those who love us, those with whom we share our lives. We become so focused on our individual jobs, responsibilities, and goals that we forget that we are also put within our families because God has a plan not only to raise godly offspring but to bless and impact this world with our families as a whole.
God looked at Adam and said it wasn't good for man to be alone. Adam needed a helper. He needed to be part of something larger than himself and what he was able to do. That has not changed. We all need helpers, and we all need to be a helper. The family is the perfect place for that to happen, but it will only happen when we realize the value of those involved and act in accordance with that truth.
I think if I could give people anything in the world, save salvation of course, it would be the knowledge of how valuable they are and how much value they are able to speak into others' lives.
Prayerfully, our outreach group will demonstrate our value of people, not just the owners of the home where we work but the value of those working as well....
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Childlike
The Man of My Dreams won tickets to the Daytona 500 in Florida, and since we could not find a sitter for the whole weekend, we opted to split the children between us and give them special child/parent time.
Because I didn't want WonderBoy to feel like he was missing wonderful things on the trip, I planned certain things that I know he loves. Our weekend has gone like this:
Man of my Dreams and WonderGirl left at 6:30 am Saturday morning. For breakfast, WonderBoy and I headed to our favorite Starbuck's where they know us by name. Then we headed home and started playing with clay, which we did for over two hours. For lunch we had a load of crinkle fries and ketchup with sandwiches on the side (the sandwiches made my conscience feel better). Then I took a 30 minute nap and sewed up some pants I needed to make while Robert played with his new clay creations. Then we jumped on the trampoline for about 30 minutes before heading in for our showers. When we were done with our showers, we loaded up and went to friends' for play time and dinner before all of us headed out to church. On the way home from church, we grabbed cookies and chocolate covered donuts. At home, we watched "The Perils of Penelope Pitstop" and dipped cookies into our milk. We topped off the night by camping on the living room floor.
This morning we woke up with the sun and enjoyed donuts and milk for breakfast. Then we spent another few hours sculpting with clay before we ate leftover pizza for lunch. After lunch we headed to the science museum where we played for a little while and then watched the documentary "Dolphins". WonderBoy loves dolphins, and this was fantastic. At that point, we were hungry, so we headed toward home, stopping by Starbuck's (where they don't know us) for a shared treat, and then walking two doors down to one of our favorite craft places to get some more clay. With clay in hand, we came home for dinner. After which, we jumped on the trampoline a bit more. When it became too dark to jump on the trampoline, WonderBoy slid into a warm tub of bubbles and played. Right now he is watching some television while I write this. Then we'll both head off to bed and get ready for tomorrow.
Tomorrow our friend Vicki is coming over to play clay (can you tell WonderBoy LOVES sculpting?), and we are going to a Mongolian restaurant for lunch. WonderBoy is the adventuresome eater in the family, and he has never been to a restaurant like that, so this will be fun. After lunch, we are going to one of his favorite parks where he can play and we can all play tennis.
I'm telling you, I really tried to make this a great weekend or him.
As we talked about the weekend, he said, "Mom, all the things we've done have been really nice and fun, but that isn't what made it great."
"Really?" I asked. "What made it great?"
"I had you all to myself. I loved just having your attention and having you all to myself."
Yes, that melted my mother's heart. It also touched my child's heart that wants my Father's attention to be enough instead of getting all wound up in what He is doing for me or giving to me.
Praying to be more childlike so I can see the joy and delight of having a Father and His attention more than anything else....
Because I didn't want WonderBoy to feel like he was missing wonderful things on the trip, I planned certain things that I know he loves. Our weekend has gone like this:
Man of my Dreams and WonderGirl left at 6:30 am Saturday morning. For breakfast, WonderBoy and I headed to our favorite Starbuck's where they know us by name. Then we headed home and started playing with clay, which we did for over two hours. For lunch we had a load of crinkle fries and ketchup with sandwiches on the side (the sandwiches made my conscience feel better). Then I took a 30 minute nap and sewed up some pants I needed to make while Robert played with his new clay creations. Then we jumped on the trampoline for about 30 minutes before heading in for our showers. When we were done with our showers, we loaded up and went to friends' for play time and dinner before all of us headed out to church. On the way home from church, we grabbed cookies and chocolate covered donuts. At home, we watched "The Perils of Penelope Pitstop" and dipped cookies into our milk. We topped off the night by camping on the living room floor.
This morning we woke up with the sun and enjoyed donuts and milk for breakfast. Then we spent another few hours sculpting with clay before we ate leftover pizza for lunch. After lunch we headed to the science museum where we played for a little while and then watched the documentary "Dolphins". WonderBoy loves dolphins, and this was fantastic. At that point, we were hungry, so we headed toward home, stopping by Starbuck's (where they don't know us) for a shared treat, and then walking two doors down to one of our favorite craft places to get some more clay. With clay in hand, we came home for dinner. After which, we jumped on the trampoline a bit more. When it became too dark to jump on the trampoline, WonderBoy slid into a warm tub of bubbles and played. Right now he is watching some television while I write this. Then we'll both head off to bed and get ready for tomorrow.
Tomorrow our friend Vicki is coming over to play clay (can you tell WonderBoy LOVES sculpting?), and we are going to a Mongolian restaurant for lunch. WonderBoy is the adventuresome eater in the family, and he has never been to a restaurant like that, so this will be fun. After lunch, we are going to one of his favorite parks where he can play and we can all play tennis.
I'm telling you, I really tried to make this a great weekend or him.
As we talked about the weekend, he said, "Mom, all the things we've done have been really nice and fun, but that isn't what made it great."
"Really?" I asked. "What made it great?"
"I had you all to myself. I loved just having your attention and having you all to myself."
Yes, that melted my mother's heart. It also touched my child's heart that wants my Father's attention to be enough instead of getting all wound up in what He is doing for me or giving to me.
Praying to be more childlike so I can see the joy and delight of having a Father and His attention more than anything else....
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Fred Tails
Several folks have been asking about Fred. It occurred to me that I have not given updates on Fred in months. For those who do not know about our Fred Tails, let me get you up to speed.
Last March, our beloved Gummie died at that age of 14. Gummie was a precious 5-pound toy poodle, and she was a joy to our family. Needless to say, we missed her, so we chose to adopt a dog. I had planned on getting an adult dog, but the children became enthralled with the idea of a puppy. For reasons we are still unable to explain, we went with that. As a result, we adopted three beautiful puppies. Tristan was mine. Ginger belonged to our daughter, and Fred belonged to our son. Tristan would be a pretty good size dog, but Ginger and Fred were Beagle litter-mates, and they would be fairly small, only 15 pounds. It would work out.
Sadly, it didn't. Ten days after we brought them home, we had to make the choice to humanely put down Ginger and Tristan due to distemper. Fred, on the other hand, had a natural immunity, and with a boost from the vet, Fred made it through.
That was last June.
In July we had another Fred Tail scare. Fred began mutilating his tail. There was a strong possibility he would lose his tail, and there was concern that the distemper had affected his brain. Even if we saved his tail, could Fred still be saved? Again, God did wondrous things for Fred. Blessed with good veterinary care, our then 20 pound Fred got to keep his tail, and there is no sign of neuropathy.
When we had him neutered in September, our 30 pound Fred came through it with flying colors. Our vet also gave us some good news. Fred was nearly done growing.
At Christmas, we decided to see how much Fred weighed since we were sure he had grown since September. While we don't have an exact number, we know our daughter weighs over 70 pounds, and Fred weighs more than Anna.
Wondering how our "Beagle" got that big? Well, a Beagle doesn't get that big, but a Jack Russell/Lab mix does.
I won't lie to you. We never intended to have a dog that is closing in on 80 pounds. His head can lie on our kitchen table while all four of his paws are on the floor. Frankly, it has been a hard road. The dog looks full-grown, but he is a puppy. He eats things like a puppy. He destroys things like a puppy. He destroyed my large watering can. He can take a chew toy for a 60-pound dog and destroy it in less than 15 minutes. One day Rob took him to a park with a cement walking track that is approximatly 1/3 mile in length. Rob wore skates and held on to Fred's leash. Fred took off at a hard run. Six laps later, Rob's skates were no longer functional. They had disintegrated. Fred, however, was ready to play fetch.
Does that sound a bit daunting? If you aren't used to big dogs, it probably does.
Granted, we were not prepared for how big Fred has grown, and I'm not sure we were prepared for how big of a blessing he is either. When you look past his size, you find a dog with the sweetest temperament in the world. He loves his family, and he tries to please us. He is magnificent with the children, although he is still learning they are authority and not puppies. He and I have a routine. First thing in the morning, I let him out of his crate, and while I have my quiet time on the couch, he lies beside me with his head on my lap. I scratch behind his ears, read my Bible, and/or pray. We hang out, and it is exactly what I had wanted in a dog, even if this dog takes up 2/3 of the couch. At night, the children go to bed. Rob works on something computer oriented, and Fred and I are back on the couch. He isn't really a lap-dog, but he is a snuggle buddy, and if your toes are cold, you can't find a better heater.
But isn't that like a lot of our blessings? When we quit being bothered that they don't look exactly like we think they should, we have the opportunity to see just how big they are, and Fred is pretty big.
Praying your blessings are big...
Last March, our beloved Gummie died at that age of 14. Gummie was a precious 5-pound toy poodle, and she was a joy to our family. Needless to say, we missed her, so we chose to adopt a dog. I had planned on getting an adult dog, but the children became enthralled with the idea of a puppy. For reasons we are still unable to explain, we went with that. As a result, we adopted three beautiful puppies. Tristan was mine. Ginger belonged to our daughter, and Fred belonged to our son. Tristan would be a pretty good size dog, but Ginger and Fred were Beagle litter-mates, and they would be fairly small, only 15 pounds. It would work out.
Sadly, it didn't. Ten days after we brought them home, we had to make the choice to humanely put down Ginger and Tristan due to distemper. Fred, on the other hand, had a natural immunity, and with a boost from the vet, Fred made it through.
That was last June.
In July we had another Fred Tail scare. Fred began mutilating his tail. There was a strong possibility he would lose his tail, and there was concern that the distemper had affected his brain. Even if we saved his tail, could Fred still be saved? Again, God did wondrous things for Fred. Blessed with good veterinary care, our then 20 pound Fred got to keep his tail, and there is no sign of neuropathy.
When we had him neutered in September, our 30 pound Fred came through it with flying colors. Our vet also gave us some good news. Fred was nearly done growing.
At Christmas, we decided to see how much Fred weighed since we were sure he had grown since September. While we don't have an exact number, we know our daughter weighs over 70 pounds, and Fred weighs more than Anna.
Wondering how our "Beagle" got that big? Well, a Beagle doesn't get that big, but a Jack Russell/Lab mix does.
I won't lie to you. We never intended to have a dog that is closing in on 80 pounds. His head can lie on our kitchen table while all four of his paws are on the floor. Frankly, it has been a hard road. The dog looks full-grown, but he is a puppy. He eats things like a puppy. He destroys things like a puppy. He destroyed my large watering can. He can take a chew toy for a 60-pound dog and destroy it in less than 15 minutes. One day Rob took him to a park with a cement walking track that is approximatly 1/3 mile in length. Rob wore skates and held on to Fred's leash. Fred took off at a hard run. Six laps later, Rob's skates were no longer functional. They had disintegrated. Fred, however, was ready to play fetch.
Does that sound a bit daunting? If you aren't used to big dogs, it probably does.
Granted, we were not prepared for how big Fred has grown, and I'm not sure we were prepared for how big of a blessing he is either. When you look past his size, you find a dog with the sweetest temperament in the world. He loves his family, and he tries to please us. He is magnificent with the children, although he is still learning they are authority and not puppies. He and I have a routine. First thing in the morning, I let him out of his crate, and while I have my quiet time on the couch, he lies beside me with his head on my lap. I scratch behind his ears, read my Bible, and/or pray. We hang out, and it is exactly what I had wanted in a dog, even if this dog takes up 2/3 of the couch. At night, the children go to bed. Rob works on something computer oriented, and Fred and I are back on the couch. He isn't really a lap-dog, but he is a snuggle buddy, and if your toes are cold, you can't find a better heater.
But isn't that like a lot of our blessings? When we quit being bothered that they don't look exactly like we think they should, we have the opportunity to see just how big they are, and Fred is pretty big.
Praying your blessings are big...
Friday, February 2, 2007
Let's Say Thanks
Several months ago I mentioned a website I frequent. It is a site that allows you to send beautiful cards to soldiers around the world. In all seriousness, in less than 10 seconds, you could send a lovely card to a very appreciative soldier.
First you pick a design, and there are several beautiful ones. Then you type in your name (tab) your state (tab) and either choose a message that is prepared for you or take the time to write your own. Then hit the "Submit" button.
I have a quick link on my computer, and any time I surf, I start at that site and send a card. Sometimes I send one card a day, and days like today when I am doing a lot of research for homeschool, I send several. I don't think there is a limit on how many you send.
The site is http://www.letssaythanks.com/Home1280.html
If you wonder if it makes a difference, check out some of the comments and see the pictures.
To put this in perspective for you, in the time you spend surfing channels during a commercial break, you could easily send four cards, maybe more. In the time it took you to read this post, you could have sent 4-10 cards. I appreciate your reading my blog. They appreciate your cards, too, so jump over there and give them a bit of your time, okay?
Thank you.
This is a comment from the website:
A letter from an Army Specialist:
As I was leaving an un-eventful Valentine's Day today, one of the mail clerks yelled "Adams!! You have a package!!" A package, I thought to myself. I'm not expecting anything. What could this be? I took the box into my office and closed the door. As I opened the box, a flood of joy came over me as I looked over the cards from you and the young ones, one of my co-workers walked in to see tears rolling down my eyes. I had never received a gift with this much love, packed into one little place from someone that I've never known.
As I thought about what the cards talked about with soldiers giving their lives and privileges up to ensure the freedom of Americans, it was nice to know that someone out there does not take it for granted. I don't know who you are, but you are truly a gift from God. The gift that gives me the drive to serve my country proudly. As you pray that the Lord keeps the soldiers here safe and brings us home, I pray to the Lord that people like you do not die off from this world. Your contributions are nowhere near inadequate. Please never forget what this means to a soldier. Thank you for your love and thoughts.
First you pick a design, and there are several beautiful ones. Then you type in your name (tab) your state (tab) and either choose a message that is prepared for you or take the time to write your own. Then hit the "Submit" button.
I have a quick link on my computer, and any time I surf, I start at that site and send a card. Sometimes I send one card a day, and days like today when I am doing a lot of research for homeschool, I send several. I don't think there is a limit on how many you send.
The site is http://www.letssaythanks.com/Home1280.html
If you wonder if it makes a difference, check out some of the comments and see the pictures.
To put this in perspective for you, in the time you spend surfing channels during a commercial break, you could easily send four cards, maybe more. In the time it took you to read this post, you could have sent 4-10 cards. I appreciate your reading my blog. They appreciate your cards, too, so jump over there and give them a bit of your time, okay?
Thank you.
This is a comment from the website:
A letter from an Army Specialist:
As I was leaving an un-eventful Valentine's Day today, one of the mail clerks yelled "Adams!! You have a package!!" A package, I thought to myself. I'm not expecting anything. What could this be? I took the box into my office and closed the door. As I opened the box, a flood of joy came over me as I looked over the cards from you and the young ones, one of my co-workers walked in to see tears rolling down my eyes. I had never received a gift with this much love, packed into one little place from someone that I've never known.
As I thought about what the cards talked about with soldiers giving their lives and privileges up to ensure the freedom of Americans, it was nice to know that someone out there does not take it for granted. I don't know who you are, but you are truly a gift from God. The gift that gives me the drive to serve my country proudly. As you pray that the Lord keeps the soldiers here safe and brings us home, I pray to the Lord that people like you do not die off from this world. Your contributions are nowhere near inadequate. Please never forget what this means to a soldier. Thank you for your love and thoughts.
Thursday, February 1, 2007
Different
Well, I have been avoiding my blog because I couldn't figure out how to make the title appear again. I changed from the old version to the new, and my titles disappeared. Being the computer semi-literate that I am, I spent an obnoxious amount of time trying to fix it only to end up muttering under my breath while threatening the safety of an inanimate object. THEN, this incredibly handsome (and smart, I also love him for his brains) man I live with took a look at it, and two minutes later, he hands me my computer with title intact. Just another reason I thank God that wonderful man's title is My Husband.
Anyway, isn't it funny where a week can take you? I'll level with you. I was struggling last week. Physically I was exhausted. My children had been sick with a respiratory thing going around. My son required a middle-of-the-night trip to the ER to deal with a double ear infection that left him screaming in pain. About the time they were sleeping well and we weren't alternating between steamy bathrooms and the deck where it was a nice 60% humidity and mid-30s temp, My Husband got hit. Now, WonderMan (and he is) is not whimp. The whole thing about how men are babies when they are sick does not apply to Wonder Man. This stuff knocked him for a loop. Usually, if the kids are sick, one of us will go to church and the other stays home with the kids. The kids still weren't up for church, and Rob was not up to taking care of them, not even sitting up and watching a movie. My Man was sick. It took about three days for him to breathe without being wheezy, and then...yep...I got it. I don't think I've been as sick as anyone else in the family, but my head has hurt, and breathing has been challenging. So, physically, I was exhausted.
Mentally, I was exhausted. Mental and physical exhaustion are hard to separate as you most likely know.
Emotionally, I don't even have an adjective. The only thing that came to mind was "raw", but I think I was pretty shut down. Granted, I was very easily affected, but is that really "raw"?
Spiritually, well, spiritually is always what seems to determine how much the first three interact, and I have to say the interaction wasn't good. Now, I didn't say I wasn't in a good place spiritually. Sometimes you can be a in good place and it still be hard. When a person is pouring forth before God and seeking the Lord and the Lord is doing a mighty work of healing or cleaning or drawing or really any kind of speaking, it can be intense. I have had a few really intense weeks.
Thankfully, I finally got a breakthrough that totally rocked me today. I've been struggling in an area, and I couldn't figure out the root. I had pretty much shut down in a lot of ways, and I couldn't pinpoint the cause. I didn't know where it had started, and I wasn't sure how to come out of it. Well, yesterday I felt like the Lord gave me the strategy for coming out of it, and today I started implementing it in faith. The Lord honored that, and today He revealed the source of the issue and then confirmed it by bringing to mind a pointed prophetic word of healing I received last fall. So now, I am sleepy but beaming. Truly, it is amazing the difference a week makes.
Actually, you know what? The week had nothing to do with it. The issue started over a year ago. A week did not break the hold. The real truth is what a difference an encounter with God makes. If you've ever been at a place of desperation where He intervened, you know what I mean. If you are pouring out before Him and pleading for help and are waiting, you know what I mean. If you have never known that kind of desperation or that kind of passionate seeking or if you've never had that kind of encounter with God, you need one. When you've had one, you'll know what I mean. There is nothing like it, and you won't be like you are after you've had it.
Isn't it glorious the difference an encounter with God can make?
Praying that wherever you are and whatever you need you will have the encounter with God that makes the difference....
Anyway, isn't it funny where a week can take you? I'll level with you. I was struggling last week. Physically I was exhausted. My children had been sick with a respiratory thing going around. My son required a middle-of-the-night trip to the ER to deal with a double ear infection that left him screaming in pain. About the time they were sleeping well and we weren't alternating between steamy bathrooms and the deck where it was a nice 60% humidity and mid-30s temp, My Husband got hit. Now, WonderMan (and he is) is not whimp. The whole thing about how men are babies when they are sick does not apply to Wonder Man. This stuff knocked him for a loop. Usually, if the kids are sick, one of us will go to church and the other stays home with the kids. The kids still weren't up for church, and Rob was not up to taking care of them, not even sitting up and watching a movie. My Man was sick. It took about three days for him to breathe without being wheezy, and then...yep...I got it. I don't think I've been as sick as anyone else in the family, but my head has hurt, and breathing has been challenging. So, physically, I was exhausted.
Mentally, I was exhausted. Mental and physical exhaustion are hard to separate as you most likely know.
Emotionally, I don't even have an adjective. The only thing that came to mind was "raw", but I think I was pretty shut down. Granted, I was very easily affected, but is that really "raw"?
Spiritually, well, spiritually is always what seems to determine how much the first three interact, and I have to say the interaction wasn't good. Now, I didn't say I wasn't in a good place spiritually. Sometimes you can be a in good place and it still be hard. When a person is pouring forth before God and seeking the Lord and the Lord is doing a mighty work of healing or cleaning or drawing or really any kind of speaking, it can be intense. I have had a few really intense weeks.
Thankfully, I finally got a breakthrough that totally rocked me today. I've been struggling in an area, and I couldn't figure out the root. I had pretty much shut down in a lot of ways, and I couldn't pinpoint the cause. I didn't know where it had started, and I wasn't sure how to come out of it. Well, yesterday I felt like the Lord gave me the strategy for coming out of it, and today I started implementing it in faith. The Lord honored that, and today He revealed the source of the issue and then confirmed it by bringing to mind a pointed prophetic word of healing I received last fall. So now, I am sleepy but beaming. Truly, it is amazing the difference a week makes.
Actually, you know what? The week had nothing to do with it. The issue started over a year ago. A week did not break the hold. The real truth is what a difference an encounter with God makes. If you've ever been at a place of desperation where He intervened, you know what I mean. If you are pouring out before Him and pleading for help and are waiting, you know what I mean. If you have never known that kind of desperation or that kind of passionate seeking or if you've never had that kind of encounter with God, you need one. When you've had one, you'll know what I mean. There is nothing like it, and you won't be like you are after you've had it.
Isn't it glorious the difference an encounter with God can make?
Praying that wherever you are and whatever you need you will have the encounter with God that makes the difference....
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