My Prayer for You Today

I don't know what is going on in your life today...right now, but I prayed for everyone in my life realm this morning, and I want you to know I prayed:

Dear Lord, you are God over all things. You know all these people by name. You know the intimate parts, the silent joys they think others will believe are dorky, so they don't tell. I pray today that they share those joys with you and y'all have a great time rejoicing in them. I pray you share laughter, giggles, chuckles, and deep belly laughs.

I pray for the pain areas that they don't know how to talk bout or human words or best efforts can't touch. I ask you to speak to those pains and heal them and be sure they know you are not afraid of the tears, the screaming, or the coffee cups smashing against the wall as long as they are only aimed at a wall.

You know their dreams, even the ones they don't put in their diaries and journals because if someone sees, they might laugh at them. I pray today you would whisper life into the dreams, especially the dreams of loving deeply and being loved, make a difference in the world, knowing they have a purpose and belong, and I pray you would breathe into the other dreams...of getting to repaint the house, go on that vacation, or get a car that runs consistantly.

Daddy, you know how they need to be led and loved. Speak clarity of mind, clarity of priority, and clarity of purpose. Show them how to love others through time, action, and word. Bless families to be healed whether they be intact or broken. Just because folks fail at marriage doesn't mean they have to fail as Christians who choose to have a healthy relationship for family's--especially children's--sake. Daddy, show us how to be good to each other and value each other and bless each other...especially those annoying enemies of ours. Thank you for loving me when I was your enemy.

Meet financial needs and give folks wisdom to see the big picture not just the big screen TV. so much of our financial issues we create ourselvs and then want you to bail us out. Give us more sense than that, and nag the stuffing out of us so we are miserable when we ignore you.

Daddy, thank you for hearing my heart and my prayers. If I have prayed with the wrong heart or wrong intent--in judgment in anyway--I ask you to forgive me. Take my words and bend them to your will for your purpose. Above all, reveal yourself to everyone on my list and in my realm of life because above all things, they need you.

I love you, Daddy. I'm looking forward to spending the day with you. Amen.

Encamped About by His Presence

Precious Ann Voskamp at A Holy Experience posted "How the Work You Do Today Can Last Forever" today. It reminded me of a very scary night that reminded me how deeply loved we are and how the Lord encamps around us. I hope it helps you see Jesus more clearly in your life, too.

Encamped About by His Presence

His face went numb, standing in front of me. I saw the fear flash in his eyes as feeling seeped from his arm as well.

I stared sure what I was seeing was not really happening, but the dead silence spoke too loudly for me to believe it a dream.

I knew these symptoms. Loved members of my family had gone numb.

He would see how he felt in the morning he assured me as he tried to rub feeling back to his face.

I grabbed my laptop and typed madly. Symptoms…numb…right arm…

Article after article, pages blinding with the same answer…and one authoritative command. “Treating a stroke within the first hour can prevent damage…”

He picked up his coat and wallet. Do not wake the little ones sleeping soundly. He’d go by himself.

My heart walked out the door with him.

The sound of the car was still filling the house when I reached for the phone. No biological family near. Only adopted ones. Despite the late hour, he picked up. “What’s wrong?” People do not call to chat at that hour of the night.

I explain the symptoms. I explain the children sleeping. I explain he went alone. I do not have to ask. “Jerri, I’ll call you from the ER.”

An eternity rolls by in the next thirty minutes. I fill the time calling friends, asking for prayer. They pray. I feel it. I do not sleep, but I do not fear. I sit and thank the Lord for His presence in Spirit and in the bodies of those who love us.

A call comes. They are running tests. He is coherent. Feeling is returning.

A whispered thank you…to God for His presence…and to our friend for his.

The night grows long. In the early a.m. hours, the phone rings. Prayer warriors asking for updates. I share what I know. They will pray until the Lord lets them sleep. I promise a phone call when I know answers.

The sun is waking up when the final call comes. All is normal. We are coming home.

We.

The husband with returned feeling. The Provider of healing, comfort, and presence. The friend who shows us how Jesus looks in flesh.

And now we all rest.

The warriors rest from their prayers and slip into sleep with praise on their lips. The neighbor calls to work. Family emergency. Will be in late. He needs to rest. I spoon with the husband returned to me. My body slips toward sleep, and I rest…in the timeless love that embraces us…in the ever loving King who encamps so tightly around the lives He gives us…through the people who fill them.

Copyright Jerri Phillips 2010

The God who Makes the Promise, Keeps the Promise

It was gone.


I knew it wasn't in the car or on the counter at home. I hadn't misplaced it. I hadn't overlooked it. It was gone.


Someone had stolen my wallet. My credit card, license, health card, check book...gone, and a tedious stretch of canceling everything lay ahead of me. I prayed that would be all.


I immediately went to customer service and gave my report to a manager. She explained they would talk to their security officer, run the tapes, and call me if they found anything. I called my husband, explained what happened, and asked that he come to the store.


I retrieved my children from the dressing rooms where they had been changing back into their clothes, and I went back to customer service to find out what actions were being taken.


A different manager, Harry, met me, listened to my story, explained the protocol, and went to find the security agent. While he did his part, I called my friend Debra.


"I need you to pray. Someone stole my wallet." I don't remember what she said, but it wasn't panicked. I told her, " I just keep hearing, 'Do you trust me?' And I do. I know things will be fine. I know this is a time of harvest and rejoicing. This is a time of increase, not decrease. The Lord did not promise depleted silos or stolen crops. He promised good things. This is just the enemy bluffing again, trying to be impressive, but God has the final word. The God who makes the promise, keeps the promise. I know this will be fine, but this stinks." She agreed it stinks. She also agreed this would be fine. She also agreed the God who makes the promise, keeps the promise.


Harry must have listened because he said prayer works, and God isn't intimidated. "God has done far harder things than return a wallet."


Don't I know it?


My mind thought back over my quiet time. The Lord had promised to meet Anna's clothes needs. He had said He would provide the jeans we had spent hours hunting. He promised all her needs would be met. He would not make promises of provision and then let things be stolen. It just isn't like Him.


Rob arrived and took the children to eat nearby. In the quiet waiting, I prayed.


I thanked the Lord for His faithfulness because He is always faithful. I thanked Him for Rob's calm reaction, Debra's ferocious faith, Harry's comforting presence, and I thanked Him for finding the wallet. It was a stretch, but I had two choices: believe the God who makes the promise keeps the promise or to let situations dictate my belief system. I choose to believe God can keep His promise, so I thanked Him.


Then my mind flashed to stories a friend who was a policeman told us, stories of shoplifters stealing medicine for sick babies, diapers, or formula for hungry children. Dear Lord, did this person need money to feed or care for a child? Why did they steal? Oh, God, meet their needs. Forgive them. Set them free from whatever makes them use this way to live. Lead them to you. They need you. They need you to save them and provide for them, and if there are children in need, do whatever you need to do to take care of those babies.


I stopped, surprised by own prayers, but sincere. I didn't know why these people stole. All I knew was they needed Jesus far more than I needed my wallet.


My phone rang with Debra's ring-tone. "I've been praying that whoever stole the wallet is only after cash, and they would throw the wallet away when they found no cash. Look in the trashcans and in the bathroom. Your wallet is still there, and everything is in it."


Satan talked loud and clear in my ear, "Do you know how unlikely that is? It would take a miracle. Miracles like that just don't happen."


My spirit spoke back. "But the God who makes the promise, keeps the promise."


Security came, got a list of where we had been, and went to pull the tape. I sat, waited, and wondered, How was God going to pull this off? I prayed, "Thank you for giving back my wallet intact. Thank you that this is going to be yet another testimony of your goodness and faithfulness."


Officer Coleman arrived. The report was made. We talked, and she went to see the tape. Rob and the children had returned, and Rob was going to use his credit card to pay for our merchandise. However, the whole reason we were shopping is because Anna needed jeans. Finding jeans for her is not an easy job. In fact, we both dread it, but we had actually found a pair, and despite the frustration of the wallet, we were rejoicing about the jeans. It only made sense to see if they had a few more pair to fit her, so off we went to the jeans.


Anna went ahead of us, and I tried to just relax. Then we heard Anna's voice ring out. "I found it! Mom, I found it!" Suddenly, she appeared...lime green wallet in hand. "I was praying as I came over here that God would help me find your wallet. I looked through clothes, saw a hint of green, and looked. There it was!"


I laughed and cried. The zipper was unzipped. The snap was undone. My credit card was there. My license was there. Everything was there. They had been looking for one thing--cash. They looked for the cash and then "threw it away," just like Debra prayed.


Yes, Harry, God has done far harder things than return a wallet, but today, it was miracle enough.


Then to add an exclamation mark to the whole situation, the jeans Anna found were on clearance, and we were thankful. Then the clerk rang them up-- 40 cents each. We all stared. She scanned it again. 40 cents. Three pair of new jeans $1.20.


Amazing.

But really, how could I expect anything less? After all, the God who makes the promise, keeps the promise.

Copyright Jerri Phillips 2009

Feasting on His Goodness--Part 1 Provision and Covering

As some of you know, last October started an incredibly hard season for us. In the last year, I have had to stand with greater determination than I ever have. I've had to resolve to believe God's promises despite situations which presented extreme evidence to the contrary. I have had to be more real and more vulnerable than I ever dreamed necessary. I've hurt more deeply than I ever knew I could, and I have faced fears that I thought would bury me.

I have also seen God work in ways beyond my wildest imagination. I have been loved more deeply and been embraced more wholly than I ever dreamed. I have danced more wildly and with more passion and abandon than I ever imagined was within me, and I have stood up to fears, attacks, and doubts and been victorious in overcoming them. I have found depth of friendship that I thought was a fairytale, and I have come to know a God who is hilariously generous with all He gives, whose heart is to protect and shepherd, whose power is greater than all my foes, and whose love and passion for me is beyond my wildest imagination.

Even as I type this, my eyes fill with tears of amazement. It's more than gratitude, although I am grateful beyond words. It's an absolute amazement at finding more than a mighty God or a saving God. It's the wonder of intimately experiencing a God whose greatest desire is me. It is beyond anything human words could express when I gaze upon a God who can create a universe in six days and so clearly see His complete devotion to me. He waits for me to wake up in the morning. He whispers to me in my sleep, and He lavishes good things on me, and I am sure there is more He wants to give, but I have been too "humble"--faithfulness, insecure, doubting--to receive it.

I am undone.

It is with such absolute amazement that I approach the fall season of harvest and a time that in the past was so marked by pain and darkness.

In September, during my prayer time, the Lord spoke to me about October. For years October has been a month of dread for me. All the demonic freedom really is hard for me and has been difficult for my children. Two years ago, things started to change, and the Lord began to redeem October. This year He gave me a new word. He said, "October will be a time of harvest and rejoicing." I had to tell my friend Debra, who was just excited as I was, and we started practicing our happy dance.

A week or so after the Lord spoke to me, He spoke a powerful word to Debra and her husband Brian. He said they were to go on vacation, and it was specifically to be during Sukkot, the Feast of Tabernacles. He gave them a solid word about what He is doing in their lives and how it started with the beginning of Sukkot. Neither of us knew anything about Sukkot, but we quickly found out.

While that was happening at their house, the Lord was settling some issues at our house. In short, I really felt Rob, my husband, was to go to the men's retreat with our church. It wasn't on the calendar, but the more I prayed, the more I was convinced he was supposed to go. The Lord said clearly it would be a time for restoration of identities for the men who attended. My heart pounded. I knew Rob was supposed to go. Ultimately, he did, too, and he is going.

When Debra and I researched Sukkot, we laughed, cried, and shouted. Sukkot is the Feast of Tabernacles (or tents), the time to celebrate leaving Egypt and bondage (the place God finds all of us in our sin or oppression) and going into the Promised Land (their true identity). And, the first day of Sukkot happened to be the first day Brian and Rob will be at the men's retreat--the one where true identities will be restored!

Needless to say, we were ecstatic. Then we had another laugh. Debra and Brian had been planning this trip for months, but due to job transition, they were unsure about money, which God provided in an amazing way. The trip? Camping...in tents. God had already put it on their hearts to celebrate the transition from Egypt to the Promised Land, and they didn't even know what it meant.

I was laughing, too, because I had decided since Rob would be gone, I'd pack the children up, and we'd go camping. Instead of fighting the popup, I'd use a tent, too. We have several tents, so that would be no problem, except I felt we were to have a tent with two criteria--room and an open top so we could see the heavens. In my human mind, though, could I justify another tent, especially when we always use our popup camper? I wrestled with it, talked to Rob, and ultimately, went tent shopping, so we could camp...the first day of Sukkot.

I did preliminary shopping online. Nothing struck me. Last night we spent a lot of time driving from store to store. Nothing overwhelmed me. Well, one thing did. However, at $120 it was well out of our price range, the amount I felt the Lord okayed for us to spend. So we ended up coming home empty-handed. Still, Sukkot was less than 48 hours away, and despite my mind's efforts to justify and compromise, my spirit knew we were supposed to get a tent. I did all I knew to do. I prayed.

"Father, if you want us to have a tent, you'll provide. I know the number you gave me ($50), and I don't have peace to spend more. However, I don't know where else to look. I need your direction. Your Word says the steps of a righteous man are ordered by you. Guide our steps."

I finished praying, and honestly, I was expecting a store to come to mind. Instead, "Craigslist," hit like a billboard on the front of my skull. I typed it in. Then I typed "tent". I stared.

"Magellan Bryce Canyon Tent....$50." And, it was not in the general DFW Metroplex. It was in our city.

I prayed. Could this really be God? Could He really be telling us to buy another tent?

I emailed a reply saying we were interested and told when we could be there to pick it up. Then I waited...

However, I didn't wait idly. I waited with a feast of celebration, a feast declaring we believe this is a month of harvest and rejoicing. We started the celebration with a feast of pumpkin bread.



The entire family got involved with the mixing, baking, cleaning, and eating. Delicious! We also made some pumpkin cream cheese. The children love it, but it is a bit too sweet for Rob and me. Still, the most fun is the fact the recipe made enough for our family and some to share. Isn't that the great thing about harvest? It keeps right on giving?

Due to unexpected rain, our plans changed, and with them, the time we could pick up the tent changed, so I emailed again. No reply, but the listing was still up. Ultimately, though, I simply had to let it go. If it was of God, it would work out. If not, He would do something else.

Then this afternoon a reply. "I'll be home then. I live at....You can call me at...." I started to laugh, and tears filled my eyes. He lived around the corner from us. Seriously. Within ten minutes we had a verbal agreement for the tent. Within 20 minutes, it was in my van on the way to my house.

The entire top is open to the heavens, and it can be split into three rooms. The center height is 84 inches. It is huge for a tent. And, while we were there, he showed us how to put it up and gave far better direction than the instruction paper. Don't you love when God goes above and beyond your imagination?!



Such is the first day of October--our month of harvest, rejoicing, restoration of true identity. It is our celebrating moving from the heartbreak of slavery--mental, spiritual, and emotional--to the joy of the Promised Land. It is a festival and a feast, and we are joyously well-fed feasting on His goodness.

Peace of Pizza

This morning I woke up with contentment that a vacation week brings. Vacation isn't a big chaotic event for us this year. Instead, it is an investing time, a connecting time--or in our case, a RE-connecting time. Busy bodies and chaotic minds have kept us apart, but not this week. This week we connect. We value each other. We declare, "You are important and worth the effort. Let me put everything aside but you."


My heart breaths deeply, and joy flows out as children's laughter bubbles forth, art projects look for places to show off, family is made into team to solve problems. Smiles of anticipation with the glances at the calendar's words of friends and fun.


Ah, yes, vacation...contentment...the wonder of being valued...


Then someone took an ugly marker and drowned my plans in graffitti saying, "We can't...something more important..."


More important...


But this is a week of being most important...


And now, where plans had brought joy to a child's heart, I had to give news that would break it.


This was the makeup party for his birthday that was hidden under blankets as he fought the flu. This is the person he considers "my only boy friend". Now, the celebration is heart ache as his "only friend" sits in a moving van headed away. He is brave, with only one question: "Can I still email him?" I smile. Of course. He is content.


I am not. I fight the mist that blurs this amazing boy in front of me, and my heart sobs with the unfairness...unfair to him...unfair to me... And I have a myriad of questions.


Why now? Why this boy? Why...? I stop. Do I dare ask these questions? Are they too real? Too raw? Do I have the courage? Sometimes the heart cares nothing for courage.


The questions tumble on their own.


Why have you not provided him with another friend? Why have you not answered my prayers? Why isn't this important to you? Do you not care?


Sometimes the heart cares nothing for courage. Sometimes it asks out of fear, and I am afraid this is far more important to a nine year old than an eternal God.


And my heart cries.


But I blink my misty eyes and ask if everyone is ready to go to pizza and game place we had on the calendar for today. A boisterous, "YES!" resounds through our home. And off we go.


Children with cups of tokens in hand wonder from game to game. For awhile I wander with them. Then I sit, watching the miracles entrusted to me, aching...wondering.


"Ma'am?"


My head and thoughts jerk to the man in the booth in front of me.


"Have you ordered your pizza yet?"


The tokens were a stash from last year. Pizza wasn't really in the budget, but fun is be free.


I shake my head in response.


"Uh, we aren't going to eat all of ours. Would you take what we have left?"


Suddenly, this man has my rapt attention. "I'm sorry?"


He repeats himself while holding out a pan with enough pizza on it for all of us. "We can't eat this, and there's no reason for it to go to waste. Would you take it? I know your children are going to get hungry. They can have this." I stare at the pizza. It is the exact pizza they like.


I think how very "uncouth" it is to take pizza from a stranger in a pizza play place. It is not the acceptable thing to do. People would think it odd, but then, some would think it odd that hear voices...like the one whispering, "If I care enough and have power enough to move the heart of a stranger to provide the perfect pizza for your children, don't you think I care enough and have the ability to provide the perfect friend?"

I blink back the mist and smile at the man holding the pizza. I reach for the pan of provision and promise and, "Thank you. We'd love a peace."

Copyright Jerri Phillips 2009